Boise woman talks about suicides of partner and brother: I miss them so much
Boise, Idaho (CBS2) – Amanda Davison is experiencing a lot of grief right now.
On March 7th, 2023, her partner Brent committed suicide. A month later, on April 7th, her younger brother Andrew did the same thing.
CBS2 and Optum Idaho have been reporting on mental health all month. Amanda, the Director of Clinical Outreach at Charlie Health, wanted to share her story in hopes of helping others.
Amanda and Brent shared a special relationship for five years. She says he was a father figure to her two children. He enjoyed riding bikes, hiking, and cooking. Sitting at the kitchen table, Amanda looks into the kitchen with fond memories. She says, “One thing we always laughed about was that Brent could never recreate a recipe exactly the way it was.”
Amanda also shared stories of Brent reading to her children and spending time with their pets. She says the successful pilot could fix anything. Now, there is a void in her life that won’t be filled. Amanda says they were making plans and taking action steps to make those plans happen. Now, she looks at their couch and sees an empty spot, his spot. Amanda says she is learning to be a single parent and leaning on the people in her life.
As Amanda grieves her partner, she is also dealing with the loss of her younger brother, Andrew. The two of them became very close after their mom died. She was just 15 at the time. Amanda says Andrew could make her laugh to the point she was crying.
“Andrew was up for any sort of adventure. We did fishing, We were super close. We were really intimate. We were each other's rocks,” says Amanda.
In a letter Andrew wrote to Amanda at the time of his death, he told her that if anyone could get through all of this, it was her.
Amanda is honest about her pain. She says, “I can do hard things. The most important thing I can do is to get up and show up.” Amanda says it’s important to be there for her children. She says people have helped her drive children to appointments, and others have given her groceries. These little acts of kindness have made such a difference. As she grieves, Amanda is trying to give herself grace because she knows her partner and brother are cheering her on.
Amanda believes all of us are here on earth to help each other. She encourages people to reach out for help if they are struggling. She hopes you’ll overlook the judgment and insecurities so you can face your struggles.
On June 1st, Amanda and her kids will celebrate Brent’s birthday. They will talk about him, honor him, and look at pictures. Doing these things helps keep his memory alive.
If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts, help is available. Dial 988 for immediate support.
