Millennials take on love
Valentine's Day is just a few days away, and many people have different views on the word 'love.' It's no secret that millennials are altering the dating world with new perspectives, but just how big of an impact are they making?
I sat down with three Boise State students to get the millennial perspective on love.
How do relationships now differ from when your parents were dating?
Brian Millar: "Back in the day, I think when our parents were kids and our grandparents were kids, it was a lot more common to get married right out of high school. A lot of us are trying to focus on ourselves and I'm working on growing myself as an individual and going from there."
Michelle Fischer: "I almost feel like people are more selective when they’re choosing their partners because you have things like tinder and all these social media apps and all these different ways you can kind of meet people and I feel like it almost creates a filtering process for you."
Amelia Albanese: "I think its definitely about goals aligning opposed to the whole romantic idea of love. I think that’s kind of fallen to the wayside. It's more about making sure your goals are aligned. If you're going to get married, its about meeting each others goals and needs versus saying 'oh we love each other and whatever gets us through love is what's important.’"
Brian Millar: "We care very much about ourselves, I feel like, so I feel like self love is a huge thing that millennials care about, so that might be another contributing factor as to why we aren't getting married as early as our parents or grandparents because we're so focused on ourselves."
What is love for millennials like?
Brian Millar: "We are more worried about our future. I can't remember what statistic it was but it was something like millennials are two times more worried that they’re going to loose their job than their parents or grandparents. I don’t think people are pushing off love and marriage necessarily, but they're more afraid to get into something like that because they're worried they're not going to be ready."
Michele Fischer: "I also think that there's less of commitment due to apps like tinder. We have so much more available to us where as before, it's kind of like, well we live in this town or this city and these are our options because this is what we have available to us. Now we can get on our phones, be in our pajamas and swipe and pick a new person instantly. I think that it's allowed people to not work through issues as much and it's kind of easier just to end a relationship than to try to work through some of the harder issues.
So do dating apps like tinder make it easier to find people people but harder to keep a relationship?
Amelia Albanese: "I feel like if we want to start having long term relationships, I think we almost need to start meeting people the old fashioned way and actually making the effort in the old fashioned way because time and time again I think its been proven that those dating apps aren’t really helping necessarily. It's easy to think the next best option is out there but I think if you're actively searching and doing it the old fashioned way, I feel like you find more of a love connection that way."
Michele Fischer: I'm going to disagree a little bit. I think tinder is great. I think that in today's day and age that’s how people are meeting people. I think it really comes down to kind of, like, being a little bit more reflective and reflecting on your values and using those apps to meet people but then not using it as a clutch when things get bad."
What are millennials looking for in love?
Michele Fischer: "I think there's a lot of pressure for outward success, especially with social media posting everything about your life. I think in the millennial generation it is very career oriented, getting your life together before you get a life with someone else."
Brian Millar: "I think the idea of starting a life with someone is more having your own life and somehow merging that with another person. It's more about having your own goals and financial stability, so you're not going in with debt or it's going to be a struggle."
And when it comes to the millennial impact on love, they say we'll just have to wait and see!